As a woman of color (and a fan of the show Suits), I watched as Meghan Markle married into a very mono-ethnic royal family and hoped for her to experience a warm welcome from the media. However, it seems like week after week provides more fodder from the press. From the family issues that seem to plague her (thank goodness, her mother seems to be a lovely woman) to the staffing changes due to her “California” work ethic (what does that even mean?), it makes me wonder how much does race play into the narrative. I have to assume a lot.
Woman of color (especially black women) have the hurtful stereotype of being aggressive and pushy. Historically, being a woman of color in a white world has been one fraught with watching your tongue in order to avoid the title of “bitch” or the crown of “angry black woman.” It is a delicate dance between voicing your opinion, but not voicing them too much – this is downright exhausting. While being a part of the royal family means Meghan Markle is unable to voice all her thoughts, I am sure that if she could the media would quickly paint her in the same role as countless other woman of color since they already are finding individuals that support the narrative of her being demanding.
While some people are able to take a break when the pressure gets too much, Meghan has a role that she must fulfill and that means being in the public spotlight. I must state that she is operating from an inherently privileged position that must be acknowledged as she is and will be a wealthy woman with access to power; however, it is also important to note that it would be hard to not take criticism personally regardless of one’s position or connection to extreme wealth. Watching Meghan Markle navigate these waters has helped me reflect upon how many women of color must navigate in the workplace and reminded me of one important truth: focus on the light.
I first thought that she has one of the best poker faces around and that is probably true because she is an actress (I really did love Suits). However, she has reminded me of the importance of confidence. While I wished we lived in a world where all women were given the ability to be their most authentic selves without judgement, we do not have that luxury.
Meghan has reminded me that when those times come (and they will come) to lean on your confidence. How do you do that? Well, when I am going through a tough time and those hurtful narrative are all around, I write down those things I love most about me and my proudest accomplishments. It may seem narcissist; however, if you can not be your biggest cheerleader than no one can! Don’t forget to read them! Learn to become your biggest fan and be proud of you.
Cultivate your confidence and own your achievements. When you are in that hurricane of self-doubt and hurtful narratives, pull a Meghan – dust off your crown of accomplishments and hold your head up because you really do got it!
